30 December 2019

My 'One Little Word'  for 2020 -

I have sat with this for quite a few weeks.... that feeling of discontentment at where I am at .. knowing that my 'default thoughts' have become negative and edgy.... and something big needs to change.

There is no doubt that 2019 has been a tough year.. I think many of us have felt it....but its time to move on ..  so my word and focus into 2020 is ACCEPTANCE... 

There is no doubt that Dads illness and then passing really rocked our world... I have felt so much sadness .. regret and responsibility ... even though we were all just doing our best.
Then my health took a knock.... and it seemed as though the universe conspired to keep the challenges coming.... I am at the point that I'm constantly on edge waiting for the next 'bad luck' event to drop. 

I now acknowledge that I am running on adrenaline and reactivity...  I have no control of my emotions...they are just 'running off ahead' doing their own thing... and nothing will change unless I do the work. Its up to me pull the breaks on.... and re-organise my thoughts and reactions... and the only way ... is to slow down...step back and focus on doing the inner work. 

Do you choose a 'Word of the Year'? ... or make a New Year resolution? 

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